Friday, April 29, 2011

I'm Confused

There has been wall to wall coverage this morning on almost all of the television channels of a wedding in England. Did any of you know about this?

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Things I Truly Wish Donald Trump Would Come Clean On

His hair. Below are statements Trump has made about President Obama and his birth certificate edited by me to now address the issue of Trump and his hair. Most of the time I've replaced the word birth certificate in his statements with the word hair. Other times I've changed words to reflect the fact that we are now talking about hair.

"I have hair. People have hair. He doesn't have hair. He may say he has hair but there is something about that hair— maybe it's fake, maybe it says he's a vain SOB, I don't know. Maybe he doesn't want hair. Or, he may not have hair."
-March 30, 2011

"I have people that have been studying it and they cannot believe what they're finding. He spent $2 million in hair products trying to get away from this issue, and if it weren't an issue, why wouldn't he just solve it? I wish he would because if he doesn't, it's one of the greatest scams in the history of politics and in history, period. You are not allowed to be a president if you have a bad comb over. Right now, I have real doubts."
— April 7, 2011

Maybe I’m going to do the tax returns when Trump does his hair. I may tie my tax returns-I’d love to give my tax returns-I may tie my tax returns into Trump's hair.”
— April 19, 2011

I've been told very recently, Anderson, that the hair is missing. I've been told that it's not there or it doesn't exist. And if that's the case, it's a big problem."
— April 25, 2011

The man is a overgrown child saying outrageous things just to get attention. When is the media going to learn.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Doggie Update

One more week to go and then we can let Little Sally Pumpkinhead outside by herself and take down the doggie pen that has been sitting in the middle of my dining area for the last seven weeks. She is so full of energy it is hard to keep her in some semblance of calmness and quiet. Part of me knows this good as it means she is almost completely healed but it feels like we have been living on a cliff with no fence between us and the edge with a dog who is determined to jump off.

If being the catcher in the rye hasn't been stressful enough, the other day Little Sally Pumpkinhead ate a 12 inch length of dental floss. That got her half a can of tuna, two tablespoons of hydrogen peroxide, and a ten minute walk around the yard. After she vomited my husband the engineer took an old toothbrush and drug it through the soft pile of goo until he found the floss. He wanted to make sure she no longer had the floss in her stomach before he cleaned the mess up. That I understood but not his need to squat over the vomit holding the floss up and examining it as if it was the holy grail.


Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The Joys Of Parenthood

My sister got this text last Saturday night from my 21 year old niece:

"I'm at Shotgun Willies (Strip Club). Happy Easter Mom."

My sister texted back:

"Me too! Look behind you."

It seems my niece and three of her friends have always wondered what went on inside Shotgun Willies and decided to give it a visit. They took a cab and the driver teased them as the spent their time in his vehicle discussing whether or not the new Smurfs movie was going to be any good. Once they got inside Willies they were so obviously out of place that one of the women on the stage leaned down to them and said, "You girls are so endearingly awkward."

That statement makes me proud. My niece and her friends were raise by parents who taught them to be open and accepting of other people and I think those ladies up on the stage could tell that by the way that they behaved while they were there.  Today, these four girls are my heroes.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Friday's Child

Nancy Sinatra

Friday's child, hard luck is her brother
Friday's child, her sister's misery
Friday's child, her daddy, they call hard times
Friday's child, that's me

Friday's child, born a little ugly
Friday's child, good looks passed her by
Friday's child, makes something look like nothing
Friday's child, am I, yeah

(Guitar Solo)

Friday's child, never climbed no mountain
Friday's child, she ain't even gonna try
Friday's child, whom they'll forget to bury
Friday's child, am I

Thursday, April 21, 2011



We used to meet every Thursday
Thursday, Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple a beers and a game of pool

We used to go to a motel
A motel, a motel across the street
And the name of the motel was the Wagon Wheel

One day she said, "C'mon C'mon"
She said why don't you come back to my house
She said my husband's out of town
You know he's gone till the end of the month

Well I was just so nervous, so nervous
You know I couldn't really quite relax
'Cause I was really never quite sure
When her husband was coming back

So it was one of the neighbors
One of the neighbors, one of the neigbors that saw my car
And they told her, yeah they told her
They think they know who you are

Well her husband is a violent man
A very violent and jealous man
Now I have to leave this town
I gotta go while I still can

We should have kept it every Thursday
Thursday, Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple of beers and a game of pool

We should have kept it every Thursday
Thursday, Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple of beers and a game of pool

She was pretty cool, too!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

21 Years Today

Sorry/Grateful from Steven Soundheim's musical Company

Spoken: Harry, You ever sorry you got married?

You're always sorry, You're always grateful,
You're always wondering what might have been,
Then she walks in.

And still you're sorry, and still you're grateful,
And still you wonder, and still you doubt,
And she goes out.

Everything's different, nothing's changed
Only maybe slightly rearranged.

You're sorry-grateful, regretful happy.
Why look for answers when none occur?
You always are what you always were,
Which has nothing to do with, all to do with her.

You're always sorry, you're always grateful,
You hold her, thinking, "I'm not alone."
You're still alone.

You don't live for her, you do live with her,
You're scared she's starting to drift away,
And scared she'll stay.

Good things get better, bad get worse,
Wait, I think I meant that in reverse.

You're sorry-grateful, regretful happy
Why look for answers, when none occur?
You'll always be what you always were,
Which has nothing to do with, all to do with her.

Nothing to do with, all to do with her.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Ruby Tuesday

Rolling Stones

She would never say where she came from
Yesterday don't matter if it's gone
While the sun is bright or in the darkest night
No one knows, she comes and goes

Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday
Who could hang a name on you
When you change with every new day
Still I'm gonna miss you

Don't question why she needs to be so free
She'll tell you it's the only way to be
She just can't be chained to a life where nothing's gained
And nothing's lost, at such a cost

Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday
Who could hang a name on you
When you change with every new day
Still I'm gonna miss you

"There's no time to lose", I head her say
Catch your dreams before they slip away
Dying all the time, lose your dreams and you
Will lose your mind, ain't life unkind?

Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday
Who could hang a name on you
When you change with every new day
Still I'm gonna miss you

Monday, April 18, 2011

Come Monday

Jimmy Buffett

Headin' up to San Francisco
For the Labor Day week-end show
I've got my hush-puppies on
I guess I never was meant for glitter rock and roll
And honey I didn't know
That I'd be missin' you so

Come Monday, it'll be all right
Come Monday, I'll be holdin' you tight
I spent four lonely days in a brown L. A. haze
And I just want you back by my side

Yes, it's been quite a summer
Rent-a-cars and west-bound trains
And now you're off on vacation
Somethin' you tried to explain
And darlin', it's I love you so
That's the reason I just let you go

Come Monday, it'll be all right
Come Monday, I'll be holdin' you tight
I spent four lonely days in a brown L. A. haze
And I just want you back by my side

I can't help it honey
You're that much a part of me now
Remember that night in Montana
When we said there'd be no room for doubt

I hope you're enjoyin' the scen'ry
I know that it's pretty up there
We can go hikin' on Tuesday
With you I'd walk anywhere
California has worn me quite thin
I just can't wait to see you again

Come Monday, it'll be all right
Come Monday, I'll be holdin' you tight
I spent four lonely days in a brown L. A. haze
And I just want you back by my side

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Let's Look At The Numbers

According to Harper's Magazine:

-Last month's earthquake in Japan moved the island country eight feet to the east.
-The amount of energy released by the quake was equal to the amount of energy used by the United States each year.

-The Department of Defense spent 317 million dollars on military bands.

-Two out of every five US millionaires do not feel wealthy.
-But if each one of those "do not feel wealthy" millionaires had at least 7.5 million dollars, well, then, they say, they would probably feel wealthy.

-Twenty-two thousand man-made objects are circling the earth right now.

-Increase in US labor productivity since 1972 is 114%.
-Wages for those workers has dropped 6%.

-According to leaked diplomatic cables, the amount of oil Saudi Arabia has could be overestimated by 72%.

-In 2010 there were 10 confirmed Muslim terrorist plots against the United States.
-During that same time period there were 25 confirmed terrorist plots by non-Muslims.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

I Think That I Shall Never See

Anything I am allergic to more that a tree.


Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I'm Hungry

For the food commercials from my childhood.

Hotdogs, Armour hotdogs.
What kinds of kids love Armour hot dogs?
Fat kids, skinny kids, kids who climb on rocks
Tough kids, sissy kids, even kids with chicken pox
Love hotdogs, Armour hot dogs,
The dogs kids love to bite!

Nestles makes the very best... CHAWWWK-KOLAAHHT!

My dog's faster than your dog,
My dog's bigger than yours
My dog's better 'cause he gets Ken-L Ration,
My dog's better than yours.

Double your pleasure, double your fun,
With DoubleMint, DoubleMint, DoubleMint gum.

Oh, I wish I was an Oscar Mayer wiener,
That is what I'd truly like to be,
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer wiener,
everyone would be in love with me.

Oh, I'm glad I'm not an Oscar Mayer wiener,
That is what I'd never want to be,
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer wiener,
There would soon be nothing left of me.

What do you want,
When you gotta eat somethin',
And it's gotta be sweet,
And it's gotta be a lot,
And you gotta have it now?

What do you want?


Cracker Jack!

What do you get,
When you open the top,
And look inside,
And smack your lips,
And turn it over,
And spill it out?

What do you get?


Cracker Jack!

Candy-coated popcorn, peanuts, and a prize...
That's what you get in Cracker Jack!

Sometime you feel like nut,
Sometimes you don't,
Almond Joy's got nuts,
Mounds, don't,
Almond Joy's got real milk chocolate,
Coconut and munchy nuts, too,
Mounds got deep dark chocolate,
Chewy coconut, oooooh.
Sometimes you feel like a nut,
Sometimes you don't,
Peter Paul's Almond Joy's got nuts,
Peter Paul Mounds don't,
Sometimes you feel like a nut,
Sometimes you don't.

We're having Beefaroni,
It's made with macaroni,
Beefaroni's full of meat,
Beefaroni's really neat,
Beefaroni's fun to eat,
Hooray, for Beefaroni!

Kool-Aid, Kool-Aid, taste great,
Wish we had some, can't wait!

Mmm -- mm good
Mmm -- mm good
That's what Campbell's Soups are
Mmm -- mm good.

Have a pizza, pizza, pizza roll,
Have a pizza, pizza, pizza roll,
Have a pizza, pizza, pizza roll,
Have a pizza, pizza, pizza roll,
(something, something) frozen appetizer was a dreadful bomb,
It was something you would sneak and drop into a potted palm,
Suddenly the Jeno Pizza Roll is here to save the day,
Appetizers now at last are edible that is why they say,
Have a pizza, pizza, pizza roll.

I hate Bosco,
Bosco's not for me,
My Mommy puts in my my milk
Just to poison me,
But I fool, Mommy,
I put it in her tea,
And now there's no more Mommy,
To try and poison me.

Saturday, April 09, 2011

Friday, April 08, 2011

Red Light, Green Light

(Remember, click on photo to enlarge)

Through early morning dark I see,
Visions of, what just can't be,
The big white bug, the ghostly tree,
Have been there for eternity

The bright red light that you survey,
In strong daylight will go away,
That light is dead, the engine, too,
It's life has passed as all things do

That traffic light up on Main Street,
It shines so bright, it's got me beat
There is no light up there you see,
With traffic flow there is no need

So just what can that green light be?
The question keeps on haunting me,
It seems to be up near the sky,
It burns so strong, though hung so high

The streetlight's glow will dim real soon,
As daylight creeps across my room,
And when it does it will reveal,
Just what the dark and fog conceal

And when it does I'll wonder why,
The green light's gone, not in the sky,
The green light's gone, where can it be?
The question will keep haunting me.

Thursday, April 07, 2011

You Don't Own Me

Lesley Gore had her first big hit (It reached No. 1 on the Billboard charts) in 1963 at age 16 with the song It's My Party. In 1964 she reached No. 2 on the Billboard charts (The Beatles I Want To Hold Your Hand was No. One.) with a slightly overproduced song called You Don't Own Me. Hidden in the lush Quincy Jones arrangement was the subversive tale of a young women standing up for herself.

You don't own me,
I'm not just one of your many toys.
You don't own me,
Don't say I can't go with other boys.

And don't tell me what to do,
Don't tell me what to say,
And please, when I go out with you
Don't put me on display, 'cause...

You don't own me,
Don't try to change me in any way.
You don't own me,
Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay.

I don't tell you what to say,
I don't tell you what to do,
So just let me be myself,
That's all I ask of you.

I'm young and I love to be young,
I'm free and I love to be free,
To live my life the way I want,
To say and do whatever I please.


And don't tell me what to do,
Don't tell me what to say,
And please, when I go out with you
Don't put me on display.

I don't tell you what to say,
I don't tell you what to do
So just let me be myself,
That's all I ask of you.

I'm young and I love to be young,
I'm free...

You Don't Own Me struck a cord with women singers and it was covered by people such as Dusty Springfield on her debut album A Girl Called Dusty.

And by Joan Jett on her debut album Joan Jett.

In October of 1964 Gore along with The Beach Boys, Chuck Berry, James Brown, The Barbarians, Marvin Gaye, Gerry and the Pacemakers, Jan and Dean, Billy J. Kramer, Smokey Robinson and the Miracles, The Supremes, and The Rolling Stones appeared on The T.A.M.I. Show where she sang You Don't Own Me. This is a stripped down, faster moving, more in-your-face version of the song. Listen to how she phrases the line "you don't own me" in this version, the emphasis is on the word "don't."

I bought the T.A.M.I. Show DVD last Christmas and was blown away by Gore's performance. It was as if I was finally hearing the song the way it should be sung. In all the versions I had listened to before it is sung as a ballad with a hint of sadness to it, as if the singer knows nothing will really change, instead of being sung as a statement of empowerment the way Gore sings it here.

Which brings me to the movie The First Wife's Club (1996). The movie starts out as a revenge flix with three former college roommates deciding to get back at their husband after each one of them gets tossed aside for a younger women but along the way their priories change as they learn to stand up for themselves. You Don't Own me is used in the movie to show, especially for one of the characters, how far each one has come by the end of the movie. The song is sung as a rousing statement of liberation. It makes me smile every time I hear it.

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Drop The Stick!

Just kind of like whenever anybody upsets me. Like I just kind of want to tear them apart... I think it's not ever going to go away... It's just who I am.

This news story has gone international. An eight-year old boy in Lakewood, Colorado went, what we use to call, "ape sh*it" at school and the police were summoned. The cops ended up pepper spraying him and putting him in handcuffs. People are split on whether or not pepper spraying the kid was a good idea. No one seems too upset about the handcuffs, though.

This is not the first time the boy exhibited rage during school hours, he has done so twice before and each time the police were called in. The mother admits her son has "a temper" and is in counseling but is quoted by Denver Nine News as saying, "It's hard. Do you listen to what the teachers tell you? Or do you listen to your child?"

OK, we have a eight year old kid who's behavior at school is beyond the pale.

We have a school system which does not hold either the child or his parent responsible for the child's behavior. The boy was still in school after doing something like this twice before?

We have a parent who evidently doesn't know that she should be listening to the adults who have been around enough children to recognize disturbed behavior when the see it and not to her eight year old son.

And we have a police department which thinks that reacting to an out of control eight year old as if he is a violent felon is fine.

I think the wrong person got pepper sprayed here and,  if the quote at the top of this post is any indication, we will be hearing about this boy again sometime in the near future.

Tuesday, April 05, 2011

So You Want To Be A Writer

Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
-Thomas Berger

The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.
-Anaïs Nin

Observe, don't imitate.
- John M. Ford

Don't try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It's the one and only thing you have to offer.
-Barbara Kingsolver

Don't get it right, just get it written.
-James Thurber

Writing comes more easily if you have something to say.
-Sholem Asch

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the other one.
-Baltasar Gracián

A good style should show no signs of effort. What is written should seem a happy accident.
-W. Somerset Maugham

It's better to write about things you feel than about things you know about.
- L. P. Hartley

The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.
- Thomas Jefferson

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
-Author Unknown
(I still have trouble this one.)

Monday, April 04, 2011

Blue Monday

Blue Monday, how I hate Blue Monday
Got to work like a slave all day
Here come Tuesday, oh hard Tuesday
I'm so tired got no time to play

Here come Wednesday, I'm beat to my socks
My gal calls, got to tell her that I'm out
'Cause Thursday is a hard workin' day
And Friday I get my pay

Saturday mornin', oh Saturday mornin'
All my tiredness has gone away
Got my money and my honey
And I'm out on the stand to play

Sunday mornin' my head is bad
But it's worth it for the time that I had
But I've got to get my rest
'Cause Monday is a mess

Friday, April 01, 2011


Do we sleep to dream or dream to sleep?

(Dreamland, Coney Island, Brooklyn, New York.)

Deeee-eee-eee-eee-eam, dream, dream, dream. As most people know a third of our lifetime is spent sleeping but what some people do not know is that 20% of this sleep state is spent dreaming. I love going to sleep every night so I can dip into my twenty percent. Most of the time I do not remember my dreams on awakening but I do remember dreaming. The dreams I do remember are varied. I've dreamed about visiting drive-in Psychics, I've dreamed about snakes, I've dreamed about being God, and I've dreamed about being murdered. I don't remember having what are considered the most common dreams; flying, falling, being naked, or being unprepared for a test but as a teenager I always had the same dream about my mouth being so full bubble gum I could not talk let alone breath. I even dreamed about houses we moved into before we lived there and when I was older about jobs I did not have or even know about yet.

When I was in weekly psychotherapy I dreamed about being murdered a couple of times. In one of those dreams I was in Denver waiting for a bus on Colorado Boulevard near South Cherry Creek Drive when an old muscle car from the 1960's raced up and a young man pointed a shotgun out of the front passenger window and pulled the trigger. (I just realized as I typed this that in the dream I was standing across from Shotgun Willie's, a strip club in Denver. This may have been my subconscious' attempt at humor.) Back then I did not understand that the dreams represented either my resistance to therapy or a fear that facing my childhood would kill me but I do now.

During that same time I had a recurring dream which started with me standing at the corner of Colfax Avenue and Downing Street in Denver. It was the middle of the night but Colfax had a continuous stream of slow moving cars driving up and down it. I wanted to cross but was afraid because the cars did not have their headlights on and their rolled up windows were darkly tinted. The fact that I could not see into the cars frightened me the most. Then in one of those dream shifts of time and space I was walking up Emerson Street just south of Morey, my old junior high school. It was daylight and, at first, I could see the school baseball field, the old houses lining the street, and the sidewalk in front of me but with each step I took the light got dimmer and dimer until I was walking in complete darkness. This darkness terrified me and each time I woke up with my heart pounding.

The last time I had the dream everything was the same except the cars had their headlights on and their windows rolled down with lively music drifting out of them. When I reached the point where I was walking in complete darkness instead of being afraid I welcomed it and walked on with complete confidence and a feeling absolute peace. That is when I knew therapy was helping me. That is also when I understood that even disturbing dreams can be helpful if you are willing to examine them and figure out what they are trying to tell you. This is the reason why I love dreaming, I can't wait to fall asleep and find out what I have to tell myself.